LADIES NIGHT

Well, it appears the ladies scored the superfecta this weekend. A filly triumphed at the Preakness over the boys, Ruth Padel becomes first female Oxford Professor of Poetry, after a controversial race. Women have been elected to the Kuwaiti Parliament for the first time. Even Lithuania scored its first female President. I can't wait for Nancy Pelosi, the first female Speaker of The House, to become the first female Speaker of The House to resign over this knowledge of the torture, following a long line of embarrasing resignations by U.S Speakers. It explains why she never instigated impeachment proceedings against Bush and Cheney, she was at least elbows deep herself.

I AM SURPRISED

Well, I have to say I am surprised. Six weeks and most everybody is still around and in fact there's even more people than before. That's probably because THE BIG ONE was postponed indefinitely due to unforeseen circumstances, put on hiatus until further notice, taken under advisement, noted, journalled and filed in the big round wastebasket with yesterday's pencil shavings and a half-eaten turkey wrap with extra bean curd, delayed unexpectedly but will return at a time to be as yet determined by a blind chimpanzee throwing darts at giant pinwheel in an open field somewhere in Iceland, but in reality was called off because the chickenshits in charge didn't have the stomach to pull it off and preferred to maintain the status quo and happily thumb their assholes and spread fairy dust and hope the current malaise will dissipate and evaporate. Whaddya' gonna' do? Kinda' annoyed the hell outta' me.

Don't start thinking this stupid flu outbreak is THE BIG ONE - when three hundred million people are killed and half the population is either bedridden with a lung busting chest infection or in the can with explosive diarrhea, then you can call it a pandemic. This just an ordinary normal flu outbreak - more people died in a Chinese earthquake for Chrissakes! Hell, you can track the spread of the infection on Google, practically live. The scientists and doctors and even Professor Barry are the most sensible ones in the country - the rest of you are looking for an excuse to let off steam and start a bloodbath towards some unfortunate scapegoat WHICH on the face of it, is more entertainment for me, but there's only so many Mexicans you can kill, and in reality, it's kinda' like slamming the barn door shut and triple bolting it shut after the horse has taken off and caught the red eye Amtrack stopover to Orlando and all points in between. You're all just upset about the economy right now. Sit down, relax a minute, breathe and have a nice ice tea.

Since THE BIG ONE has been shitcanned (though some airheads in Australia are actualling spoiling for a war with the PRC - can you say,"Goodnight, Bruce!"?), it looks like humanity has decided to take the long road, see how many resources it can squeeze while boosting its numbers beyond the twenty billion mark. Oh, you think that's ridiculous? You'll wish you were a software construct in twenty five years. The reason for THE BIG ONE was to stave off a population event horizon by effectively halving the population immediately and causing an artificial population decline for a couple of generations, allowing breathing room for the future descendents, okay? Cold , you say. Yeah. You gotta' better idea? A pragmatic effective idea? Thought so ....

Hey!Hey!Hey! I'm back ....

... not that it was exactly my idea. The Universe isn't through with me yet. Apparently, the signal wave that I was riding on was deflected by some shiny parabolic piece of rock about three months ago and as co-incindences go, directed me right towards Earth, deepinaheartoftexas. Sorry about the mess. Actually, my evil twin, who remained on Earth, and has been having wreaking his own special kind of havoc, was busy running satellites into each other, when I showed up. As luck would have it, we had a nice little Kirk vs. anti-Kirk type tussle, taking out a passing cylindrical rock about the size of a Chevy Suburban, and a part of East Central Texas landscape. Anyway, Evil George software construct has been neutralized, I locked him in a for-next loop where he's condemned to replay a character in episodes of That Girl. It's a special kind of hell reserved for special kind of guys.

So, now I'm back. And things are getting worse. And everybody is running scared. Well, at least I didn't miss the big fireworks yet, that's not due for another two or three weeks ... but I don't wanna' give away too much.

Events are getting tenser

In case world events seem a little chaotic and strange and any of you do not believe faux George is responsible, let alone exist, please avail yourself of this bit of fiction .... or is it?

.... uh oh!

Apparently faux-George's Last Message is a clone of himself. He really managed to make a spinoff, and used my machine for it to nest while he dispatched himself to the stars. I'm writing from a different machine. When I realized what was happening, I tried to shut everything down, but enough packages had been unpacked to pick up the rest of program, fry the motherboard and the hard drive and take off to who knows where.

I fear chaos will ensue.

My privileges will probably be revoked to this blog. Sorry my entries weren't as entertaining as faux-George. Let's hope the mischief will be at a minimum.

....found it!

Found the file faux George left, apparently he has a lot to say it's wrapped up in a compressed file that's damn near huge, operating system huge, I'm talking Debian with full packages. This'll be awhile.


Here goes ....

.... apologies are in order.

1.) Sorry, on Wednesday Nov. 5, I should have posted faux George's final message to the Universe, but on Tuesday Nov. 4, I was admitted to the hospital for a life threatening intestinal blockage. At one point, I was on the verge of joining both Georges into The Great Beyond or The Big Hum. It was that bad. But then the blog would never be finished. I hope never to have to go through that uncomfortableness again. Man, is that ever painful. On the upside, while I was hooked to all these machines and tubes, I was weaned off my carbonated caffeineinated beverage dependence. Apparently, bed rest, endless episodes of Law & Order:Criminal Intent and lots of morphine helps.
2.) Apparently, faux George's Final Message has gone missing, and even I haven't read it yet, so I won't even attempt to recreate something I haven't seen (I'd think many of you would spot something fishy, you can't really fake somebody's style without giving something away). So, while still in semi-recovery and without the benefit of carbonated caffeineinated beverages or morphine I will hunt down the file and post it to this blog as soon as humanly possible. Thank you all for your understanding and patience in this matter.
3.)BTW, who won the election? Nevermind, I'll check out South Park episode, "About Last Night", online. I hear it's a doozy.